Funny Alan Partridge Quotes

Funny Alan Partridge Quotes Each Alan Partridge quote on this page is unlike anything you have ever read before. The humor is off-beat, and you will have to spend some time getting used to it. But, Alan Partridge has a cult following, and as they say, a million Britishers cannot be wrong! Quotes About Wine and Food All this wine nonsense! You get all these wine people, dont you? Wine this, wine that. Lets have a bit of red, lets have a bit of white. Ooh, thats a snazzy bouquet. Oh, this smells of, I dont know, basil. Sometimes you just want to say, sod all this wine, just give me a pint of, mineral water. And, can I have the same, please? But with different shaped pasta. What do you call those pasta in bows? Like a bow-tie, but miniature? Like an action man bow-tie. Can I just shock you? I like wine. Despite what I just said earlier. At any one time, I have nine bottles of wine in my house. Zingers and One Liners Electrolysis. For hair removal... and... dissidents. BANG! Im James Bond. You make pigs smoke! Ha ha ha ha ha. Youve got to laugh when you fall off a sofa! Bloody Sofa. Classic Conversation to Lynn about Dan Dans a fantastic man! He really is. I was talking to him early and he asked me what kind of phone I had and I said a Motorola Timeport. And he said, thats saaad, you wanna upgrade. I said, so do you- to a new face. He nearly soiled himself! He said he was laughing so hard he had Kenco coming out of his nostrils, and that made me laugh. But...my nostrils were clear. More Funny Quotes Do you know what this bathroom says to me? Aqua. Which is French for water. Its like being inside an enormous Foxs Glacier Mint. Which, again, to me is a bonus. Guide dogs for the blind. Its cruel really, isnt it? Getting a dog to lead a man round all day. Not fair on either of them. Hello is that Currys? Id like to place an order for two supplementary, auxiliary speakers, to go with my Midi Hi-Fi system, apropos achieving surround sound. Apropos...its Latin. You got to have a basic grasp of Latin if youre working in..Currys. Oh  , youve got them excellent, one last thing, what time do you knock-off? Fancy going for a drink? No? Sorry, just thought Id ask. I do like that toilet. Its very futuristic, isnt it? Very, sort of, high-tech, space age. I can imagine Buck Rogers taking a dump on that. In the twenty-first century. Can I, have a go?